Welcome Fall

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Fall ushered its way in this past week with chilly nights and chilly mornings.

 We were a bit unprepared. I caved and turned the heat on just a little bit to take the chill out of the air as it was 60 degrees in the house when I woke up. That is a huge difference when we have been use to 72-78 degrees all summer. I have layered and bundled the kids every day. They got some new fleece pajamas from Aunt Tracy. I didn't think we would need them yet but they came at the right time. They love wearing them. Ari likes being snuggly warm. He just was not happy that Lilliana kept squeezing him.

 

 It has meant Ari gets to wear his first pair of jeans. He likes to sit in his bumbo while we do school. 

Lilliana spends her time running from table to the homeschool table to get things down do play with. She at times drives me nuts. Since Anthony took out the air conditioner she loves to look out the window. Really truly though the majority of school days go with me constantly saying, "Lilliana sit on your butt your going to fall." "Lilliana NO! leave the Markers alone!" "Lilliana stop whining Eli is trying to work." "Lilliana stop drawing on the table." "Lilliana go get your baby so Eli can work." Then I end up changing a poopy diaper of course. She never poops first thing those mornings only to let Ari start crying and I tell you thank goodness Eli is good and continues to do as what I have left him to work on. Yes I am crazy for even attempting homeschooling. Friday was a good day for her though. She played so nicely and was looking out the window watching the geese fly south so intently.

Eli is doing so well with school though. I couldn't be happier. Lilliana is also learning just by being around because she pointed to the A hanging on the wall at dinner and said "A." I figured she would pick things up. 

Friday I had to work and Ari's swing broke!!! It was a sad sad day! Thank goodness I was able to find one this weekend because he and I both depend on it at work and home. He missed it all weekend. Thankfully I found one Sunday night. I put him in it and he was out like a light. He needs to be moving constantly to fall asleep it seems so we were so glad to get a new one as we went through a couple days of fussiness. Since I didn't have his swing on Friday at work he got a new rattle to entertain himself. It is made out of cornstarch and "Eco" friendly. I don't necessary care about that but he really liked it! 

 

Eli and Lilliana went with Anthony's mom on Saturday per the usual. They had a blast. Ari stayed home and I got some good snuggle time with him. My next month is packed for photo sessions. I do have some photos I still needed to edit but I needed Saturday just to enjoy Ari and the kids when they got home. He was cranky but we still had a good time together. 

Saturday night Anthony put them to work since they were bored and bouncing off the walls while waitng for dinner. They actually loved it. 

 

 Sunday morning I woke to everybody coming to cuddle in bed with Ari and I. I do love family cuddles. They are nice until well about 20 seconds in when Eli is bouncing on the bed! Lilliana is standing up grabbing the headboard and shaking it. All the while I am thinking really why can't you all lay down and cuddle. It seems so nice in my head. Sadly, it never lasts. Two minutes in I declare we are done and everybody but Ari and I need to get out of bed! Then they bounce on and off the bed for five minutes. Finally Anthony and I look at each other and say yep another failed attempt! Anthony and I were talking while Eli was bouncing around though. It went something like just think a couple more months and 3 will be bouncing everywhere. Eli proceeds to think we are talking about another baby and asks "mom do you have another baby in your belly?" We reassure him that NO there is not. So he says, "But WHY!?" He then says, "we need another baby in your belly because we only have one and need two." Yeah Eli I hope that does not happen any time soon! Anthony tells him to talk to God about that. So I am sure when Eli prays in the next few days he will ask for another baby to be in Mom's tummy. He loves his brother and sister so much. It is so cute. It was funny he was talking about another baby as we had a farewell time at the Birth Center that morning/afternoon. We went and gave them support and took pictures with them. I am not sure of everything that will go on but it was the last time we were able to visit "The Greenhouse Birth Center." There seems to be in the works another birth center opening there so we will see what happens with that. We are excited and hopeful either way to what happens. It was also AMAZING to see the midwives again. We got a picture with the kids with each one that was there for their birth. 

Many thanks to Audra 3 1/2 years ago with Eli....

Many thanks to Clarice 19 months ago with Lilliana! Shelie made it a minute too late as Lilliana was just so excited to meet us all so we could see her pout! Somethings never change and we still see this pout frequently.

 

And many thanks to Audra and Shelie on that very hot summer day with Ari..........

Also many thanks to all the other behind the scene staff at the birth center especially Mitzi! We love them all dearly and are forever grateful for all their expertise, encouragement, love, support, friendship, and most of all being their for our children's births.

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All in all it has been a great weekend. Anthony is laid off again so it means hopefully more home projects get worked on if we can keep the kids occupied. I also have 3 very fun photo sessions this week! I can't wait for those. Fall is here in Michigan and I do love this time of year and the trees so it will be a wonderful week!

My Heart GRIEVES



Three tiny little hats. Really they seem like nothing, but there is so much meaning behind those hats. One may have been worked on during another baby's birth, a vacation, knitting class, or just for relaxation. Each one was worn by one of my three munchkins and made with so much love by one of my wonderful midwives. I think Clarice made Lilliana's and Ari's. I am not sure who made Eli's. Regardless they were made in love and hold so many special memories, meanings, and most of all so much Love.

When I was pregnant with Eli and looking into birthing options I was so thankful and so beyond blessed to find The Greenhouse Birth Center. Receiving all the great care I did during his pregnancy was amazing. I remember falling in love with Clarice because she reminded me of my Grandma. Shelie I didn't know as well but after my first appointment I loved her. Kip was just amazing and always reassured me at the right times. Then there was Audra. While I love all of them dearly Audra will always hold the most special place in my heart! From the first appointment I had with her as she was actually still training I knew I loved her. She has the most amazing heart and is so caring. We became instant friends and I hoped I would see her every appointment. When I had to transfer to the hospital it was she they called to go with me. I felt so bad for her as at the time she was working at the peforming art theater too. She had little sleep and stayed with us. I remember not being able to do my hair and that wonderful person stepped in to do it for me and helped me through so much. I remember little after a while but I know she was there for love and support.



They were so busy the week Eli was born. Regardless they still found time to make sure we were ok even though we did not deliver at the actual Birth Center. Shelie came the night before Eli was born. She took some of my most cherished photos. She has taken all my maternity photos. She also sat and visited and made me feel more comfortable. After Eli was born Kip made the trip to the hospital. Poor Mitzi who is the receptionist got my breakdown call to them that I just wanted out of the hospital. She sent Kip as soon as she could. Kip continued to visit after Eli's birth when we were able to go home. There was never any doubt we would use them again for our future baby's births.

When I found out I was pregnant with Lilliana I again called them. They were all thrilled. By this time Kip had retired and Audra had taken her place. I remember seeing Clarice for my first visit and was so excited. Many ups and downs occured with Lilliana and there was even question as to whether I would be able to deliver with them again. Thankfully it happened. Clarice kept me strong during this labor. She knew exactly what I needed and was so amazing. Out of any of my births it was the easiest and best.

Anthony and I thought we were done for a while. Then along came Ari. God has a sense of humor because now I know another reason why. More on that in a moment. By this time the center was busy enough to have hired another midwife. Her name is Kendra. We fell in love with her right away. Her love for Jesus and her faith was amazing. I remember her encouraging me in so many ways.

They all once again were amazing and helped through my fear of the high blood pressure. When it came time to deliver. Shelie and Audra were the lucky ones. I was so excited as Shelie missed Lilliana's by a minute literally. Lilliana just came to fast. I had wanted Audra at all of them due to our wonderful connection. It was fitting. I was especially thrilled as Shelie is an amazing photographer too and had taken so many beautiful pictures of Lilliana's birth. It worked out wonderful and again I had exactly what I needed for each birth.

Each of these wonderful womem has such great talent and such loving spirits. They each bring something unique to this practice.

Today was my final appointment. I do literally mean my final appointment with these dear ladies. Even if we have anymore children this amazing Birth Center will more than likely be closed. They are battling a lawsuit and in order to even survive they are more than likely going to have to close. I have bawled my way through this entire post. These woman have spent so much time with me and I with them the past 4 years! They are like family. Some of their lives may be ruined. They have no job to speak of at this point. They will lose income and honestly may be sued and be in debt forever.

I have learned something though. I have learned many things I should say. First God knew what he was doing with Ari. I can't imagine having any more of my children anywhere else. I am so grateful and proud to call my three Birth Center Sprouts.

Second, no matter how hurt you are lashing out in anger just hurts more. The family sueing I am sure grives over the loss of their baby. Who does not? I grieve over that. I know the midwives do too. Nobody ever wants that. In the end them being angry and and suing just hurts many families in the community as it is taking away an option for birth. It is sad.

Thirdly, I have learned not to rush to judgement. I would like to say choice words to this family I really would. This entire thing hurts and disgusts me. I need to forgive though. I also need to realize there are two sides to every story. I have only heard one and that is enough to make my blood boil because I can't imagine half of it even being true. In the end everybody has to answer to God. I pray they do the right things.

Finally I have learned these women are amazing. They have given up everything some literally everything just so they could provide out of hospital births. They are wonderful. I wish I could give them jobs and financial security. Sadly I am not a millionaire. I hope by some miracle the birth center does not close.

If you live in Michigan now is the time to write your congress members. Here is a link  http://us2.campaign-archive2.com/?u=80d7915b43d0eb1b27b6924ec&id=1338e3347a to what can be done for better protection for midwives, families, and better care all around for pregnant woman. Maybe had some sort of legislation been in place none of this would have happened. Instead many acted in good faith and have lost much. It is beyond sad a baby passed. It does not warrent more lives ruined. If a hospital loses babies or mothers, which I guarantee they do they are never shut down. It is ridiculous that midwives are though. It is a sad day. My heart breaks and grieves.


As I watched my children play with the beloved train table, I realized this will be the last time and no future children will be able to love it as mine and so many others have. It is devasting and makes me so sad.

Please keep these wonderful womern, the rest of the volunteers/staff, the families who have delivered there, and the family that is suing in prayer. Many are hurt and grieving. Mistakes happen, poor judgement can be made, some are stubborn, but we are all human! Sometimes the mistakes, poor judgment, and stubborness lead to awful things. This is one of those cases. I pray for love and comfort for everybody. Please once again help the cause of midwifery in this state.  http://us2.campaign-archive2.com/?u=80d7915b43d0eb1b27b6924ec&id=1338e3347a