37+2 in and 37+2 out

I have had today's date marked on my calendar for months waiting to see the big change! It is hard to believe these huge girls were that tiny in my belly. The day they were born and today 37+2 weeks after they were born. My tiny little surprises are huge and full of all sorts of fun. I feel like I look better pregnant and miserable than I do now. I think we will count that as just being tired:)

I also figured it was high time I get their 8 month photos posted. This month's photos are pretty humorous to me. I pretty much just gave up wrangling and just pressed the shutter button. It was more real to where we are. Two babies in all different directions into it all!

Annalise

Annalise is now officially crawling!! She is still content to sit and watch everybody, but she will crawl if she wants something. 

She has 7 teeth. She is weighing in at a whopping 21 pounds. She has begun wearing some twelve month clothes. She began pulling up to things today. She also has learned to wave in the past two days. She says "hi" now. She still is not saying Dad, but Mom is a constant word these days. She likes to bite unfortunately. She does not like solid food. She tends to take a bit gag and spit it out no matter what it is. Needless to say I am a bit exhausted nursing her so much. She is a huge cuddle bug and for the most part is very sweet and happy. Her hair is now blond almost and her eyes are changing to a green or maybe hazel. Jesus Loves Me is her favorite song. I usually sing it before she falls asleep.

Daphne

Daphne-Doo is into everything. She is all over the house and spends her days exploring. She is getting her 7th tooth. She loves to wave and give a big smile to strangers, but does not liked to be held by them. She weighs 20.5 lbs. and is also not enjoying solids. Needless to say two almost 9 month babies nursing all day is a bit exhausting. She loves the dogs and always is trying to pet them. She loves bath time and loves to splash. It is such the change from when we first began bath time with her. She is a go getter but so sweet. She also has so much energy. She reminds me so much of the boys at this age. Her hair is still flaming red and she has the most beautiful blue eyes. Jesus Loves me is also Daphne's favorite song. 

Every month it is getting more bittersweet. I will be happy for them to begin eating and sleeping a little better, but I will so miss them being little babies. 

Happy Birthday to My Love-Self Portraits of Motherhood

One of these days, this space will not be so forlorn and forgotten. I have two months of photos to share. Christmas is coming and in my quest for handmade this year, I have been sewing away. It has been awesome. I also have not been getting a lot of sleep so my normal stay up late to blog or get up early just isn't happening. Hopefully as things settle a little bit more I can get back to a more consistent schedule.

For now, I leave you will another self portrait with my dear and wonderful husband! He had his birthday last month. I usually just get a picture with the kids and him, but jumped in this year. I am so glad I did. I so love this man dearly. He works so hard so I can stay home with these crazies all day. It is exhausting, but without him there is no way I could. He also does not enjoy all the fuss on his birthday, but we love celebrating him. I am so thankful for him. Here is to another year with him and hopefully we are both less tired.....haha I know joke is on me!

Self Portraits of Motherhood- Diaper Changes and Reflections

Today is a big day in reflection for me. One year ago I walked in for an ultrasound so excited to find out the gender of our fourth child only to be told there was two little girls on the way!!! I don't think I will ever forget the feelings of that day let alone week. It was bittersweet beyond measure. That week brought a crazy amount of growth to me as a person and mother. Many things I had to eat my words with because I openly proclaimed I would never have another c section except for breech or twin births. God must have had a funny sense of humor. I prayed so hard for that vaginal delivery, but these girls were just stubborn. Then there was the sheer fact of two babies. I was scared beyond belief but somehow I sucked it up. 

I reflected today to see if I would have changed how I felt or done anything different. The answer is a big no. I had to mourn the loss of my homebirth. I also had to mentally prepare for a hard pregnancy and a crazy first year. I wasn't planning to be cut open and recover from that, but I am finally at peace with that.  8 months later and I still am dealing with issues from my incision. It can be a hard reminder to think back to those first couple of days of Daphne being in the NICU because my mind always goes there. Thankfully I am finally emotionally and mentally accepting and being ok with it all. 

The reality of all of this is it has been 100 times better than I ever could have imagined. I say that with 2 weeks worth of photos just sitting waiting to even be pulled off a memory card. I say that as my days fly by just from all my mom responsibilities. We are doing good if I am in clothes by lunch time. I say that as my laundry is a bit of a mess at the moment. I forget to brush my teeth some days. I also have hardly slept the month of October thanks to lots of teeth and sick babies. I knew that would be rough and it has. It is worth it though.

I have watched my oldest child become so responsible and bond with Annalise like he has never bonded with another sibling. I have watched Ari become the biggest lover and protector of the babies. He has grown into a big brother and does a marvelous job. I have watched Lilliana enjoy the role of being an older sister and also "second mom." We are working on that one. Regardless it has been wonderful. I have also watched myself grow in ways I didn't think possible. Taking all 5 out just is not daunting anymore. I have watched my husband become an even better dad if that is possible. We also work together better than we ever have. 

Then there are the girls. They have really stolen all of our hearts and been the biggest blessings to us. It is amazing how awesome it is. I could go on and on about them, but Ill spare all the details for their 8 month post that may or may not get done this week.......

Diaper changes may seem so silly to photograph, but I don't want to forget the wrangling of two and the interaction we have. The girl's pretty much look forward to being tickled and  "This Little Piggy," especially Annalise. That girl LOVES it. Daphne likes it, but then she is on the move again. I took the time one day to document it messy hair, mess all around, and just a typical day around here. 

I am so thankful for all of our kids, but especially the blessing of two at once!! 

A Michigan Fall

Pure Michigan shows so well in October. Seriously October probably tops my favorite month of the year just for the fall colors. This year has been a wonderful one too. The leaves have slowly changed and it has been nice. They hit their peak this past week and it was glorious! I have not gotten to enjoy it as I usually would because let's just say 5 kids and lots of new baby teeth emerging. Truthfully I am kind of over here surviving barely making it above water. In fact fall leaf pictures almost didn't happen. I figured the leaves would  be off the trees, but thankfully it all worked out. This is the latest I have ever done them and the result has been wonderful. 

The kids also love when the leaves fall. They spend hours outside with the rakes playing in the leaves. One particular night was so warm and they were out enjoying the leaves. It was almost dark. I actually figured these would be this year's pictures. 

Just as it was time to come in and get ready for bed Ari comes running in the house to yell, "look I'm pregnant!" It was hilarious. Of course Lilliana and Eli had to follow and do something silly too. 

Fast forward to last night and finally we decided it was the night. It was chilly, but considering the kids did pretty great. 

I can't decide if I am really smart of if I just am really sooo tired that this is the best solution. I had every intention of making all five kids costumes this year. In fact a month ago we began planning. I was not buying costumes. I know $20 is not expensive, but when you have 5 kids or even 3 it is! So, we were planning to make them.  I could probably spend a bunch of time thrifting for them, but honestly I just don't have that time to dedicate to it. Well, the babies just have not slept and Anthony and I could not get it together with Soccer every Saturday and then keeping the house up, homeschooling, and just being present for five kids. Last weekend it was apparent it was not going to happen. We also are getting to the point we do not put undo stress or burdens on ourselves. We are learning no. We just have to. So, I casually asked the kids how they felt about staying home and having a Halloween party instead. We could buy Halloween candy, make popcorn balls, have cider, have homemade Halloween masks, and watch a movie. My kids didn't even bat an eye. They were thrilled and that is all they have talked about. They can't wait. All they cared was that we bought some candy. So tonight we are having a party. They spent yesterday making masks with Anthony so we took some pictures of them. Ill table our costume ideas for next year and hopefully I get started earlier. 

Michigan has been good to us this fall. Now if I could get some sleep I might feel even better.